Akita

one day

why?!!!! this is never ending. i cant believe this. i'm barely 24, and yet because of you, i have to clear the problems u created for me. PROBLEMS! and i cant escape. if i say i dun help u, u create more troubles...at a certain place, with dire consequences. if i help u, there's neverending requests. I'm tired of all these. stupid request. u say u will return but since when???!!!! going 2 years, and i barely cleared even 1/5 of it. instead, there are more i have to return. and now u still want?!?!! and how can u just open pple's letters? what say if i open ur letters!! this is call privacy and respect.

i'm really tired of all these. the feeling of wanting to do something drastic is back again. since jc times. one day. just one day when i have the courage and when i really cant take it. i will do something drastic. trust me.

fed up

total disappointment.
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and i'm fed up with the constant no replies. i give up. u want to reply, u reply. else i heck care.

they are back! Gee..

argh

informally grounded. sianz. wasn't able to go airport and send ken off as a result. though i cld have sneaked out but i didn't want to take the risk of unable to go for training on sunday - but i think i still have to give it a miss. dad's not really happy with the coughing and yet training situation. and it doesn't help that i had been out and home late for the past 5 days out of a possible 6 days for the week (and 6 out of 7 if u include last sunday). i don't like it too but what can I do?

no choice yeah. it's getting to me..feeling more and more tired with all the late nite travels back home and waking up early the next day for work. it doesn't help that my cough is still there - i cant drink coffee to get me focus during office hours.

work was a little boring for me these few weeks with me unable to do more as i'm not the limiting factors for most of my projects. i just hope when everything starts again for all my projects, i wont get stuck doing multiple things for multiple projects at the same time. and i really dread calling this client for this project do ask them to do some maintenance - really dread the effect of asking them to do so. and if i don't do so, it may end up another 2 - 3 days stuck at the client's place again. argh.

why cant i just play handball? and able to earn money from it? SIGH. i need a break. from everything.

will i?

wiil i ever be a great keeper? will i ever be a good one? will i ever be to my team as norway's lunde to her team or palinger to hungary or the korean keepers to korea?

i hope to. i wish to. i WANT to. will i? I want to say I will. but its a matter of time and a matter of mentality. Time will say it all. till then. it's work now.

sigh

just

just so tired. just so not enough time. just so only me. and a little bit confused over it..just so wish there are more than one me.

HANDBALL

still loving it. HANDBALL. this sport. :)

no matter how tired the training can get. no matter how tough it is. no matter how long it is. no matter how it is taking up my free time. I'm still LOVING it.

am always willing to give up my comp usage time for it. am always. - till the day i start disliking it. which i doubt. simply simply simply LOVE handball keeping.

yeah wed is pub hol!